Exit, Exit, Enter


As We Grow Older, Our Heart Shrinks
September 5, 2010, 11:20 pm
Filed under: Misc Thoughts

In proportion..

When you find yourself walking through a large city at cognizant age you start to realize how small you are. Even in the countryside, look up at a clear sky. The dizzying number of stars dwarf you. Your comprehension is swallowed by the scale-less abyss. You are small indeed.

You are particularly small when you are young, but your ego and self-importance is as a big as your head – relatively speaking (have you ever seen a baby’s head?). But, nothing is as big as your heart. As a fetus our heart-to-body ratio is 9 times that of the same ratio at birth. It of course further shrinks as you get older. It then can be (and is being) argued metaphysically that one does not love more than that at birth – when we are crying and in shock as we emerge into this small, blue-and-green world.

I find myself thinking back onto my sport-playing younger self, and how I used to think that I was the best at every sport I played, when in actuality I really sucked. Up until a few years ago I thought I was a lot better at Tennis than I actually am. I digress.

As babies we have this unconditional love for and dependence on our parents. The former decreases into a conditional, colder, more thoughtful love, and the latter simply wanes into the abyss. As we get older our heart grows , we love less, we think more, and yet we feel more. How is that our heart grows, we believe more in feeling, but we love less? These are the proportions of which I speak. Our capacity to love shrinks as our desire to love grows.

‘Tis a dastardly thing.

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