Exit, Exit, Enter

You’re certainly ..great….?
January 16, 2009, 2:51 am
Filed under: Misc Thoughts

I think it’s so weird coming across people who you were once intimate with or just plain close with. Whether they be ex-girlfriends or ex-best friends it’s always really, very awkward. You never know what to say because you don’t know what’s too much and what’s not enough — after all, you don’t want to put them off.. if you ended on good terms, of course. I really wish that it wasn’t so awkward. I wish that it was just as easy the second time as it was the first time. I suppose wishing that almost amounts to wanting that, though that’s not what I intended to say at first or at second or right now.

Intimacy and the connection that goes with that are not as respected as much as they should be for me. I especially realise that now that I have ex-whatevers. It should make me cherish what I have now that much more, right? I don’t know.

There’s something about coming face-to-face with what was that sits on the back of your tongue weird. There’s something about seeing them skin-level knowing that the same (or completely different, the horror!) thing that you are thinking about is running through their brain, veins, bones, muscles, and lungs. The vulnerable thing about this is that it is either a hit or miss. Either you’re on the same page or you’re not. And, the even more inconvenient thing about that is that even if you are on the same page, you both are in different books.

There is something about this confrontation that is regrettable but so contradictorily familiar. There is something both worthwhile and while-less..for better word. Although it isn’t too often that a person like me comes up to a person like that, the quality makes up for the quantity. One day out of every month mind as well be one day out of every week. It mind as well be, it mind as well.


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